how much everything in my life can be going great, fabulous even, and stupid relationships with boys can mess it up. Why does it affect me so much more then everything else? must be a girl thing and it probably doesn't help that i'm all prego and emotional. ugh, sometimes i just don't understand what God is trying to have me learn, why things had to go this way, etc.
i mean idk. it takes two ppl to get pregnant, i wish it took two ppl to be pregnant. in the words of the wise juno, "at least you don't have to wear the evidence under your sweater." i guess thats what i get for having an illegit child with a guy who doesn't love me :/
on a much brighter note, mothers day was pretty good, we had a really nice party. it was weird being included into the festivities. doesn't much seem like i'm a mother yet. I've finally hit the five month mark, 20 weeks, the halfway point :] :] :] which is awesome sauce. i'm sooo excited. The baby is getting bigger, squishing my guts more, and yes, kicking lots more and with more force.
Things are looking about the same as they've been, a bit up and down but it's kinda leveling out. i am looking into school and work which will be really good. i can't wait to go to school. hopefully i'll be able to make a decision on the baby soon so i can't start into preparing all of the many things i need to get ready for it to come.