Tuesday, June 21, 2011

Common Misconceptions

Judgement happens every day. Sometimes it's a good thing ie: that cars brake lights came on, I should probably slow down. Sometimes its a really bad thing. I think my life has been filled with more of the bad then the good.

I feel as though peoples ignorance about situations turn into judgements that ultimately end up hurt themselves and other people. Granted, I understand that ignorance takes time and willingnesd to remedy, but how much effort do you see being put into learning as opposed to judging?

I'm LDS so I must be judgemental, think I'm better and more righteous then other, and be crazy religious. I come from a family who is well off so I must be spoiled and think I'm better then everyone else. I'm 20 so I must be immature and stupid. I'm a single mom so I must be an ignorant whore who slept around and will never learn her lesson. I decided to keep my kid after getting pregnant so I must be selfish and ignorant. I have BPD so I must be crazy.

How ridiculous and demeaning is all of that? And how hard is it to open your mouth and your mind to ask and get to know what kind of person I really am?

The hardest for me are the common misconceptions about being a single mom. Being a single mom is HARD. There are.a lot of tears involved. Then think about being a single mom as a teen? Its twenty thousand times harder. The challenges I face daily are ones most people couldn't imagine. I have crap to deal with all the time with my babies dad, on top of school, expenses, therapy, soon work, and taking care of myself and my son every day. Its hard enough to learn to grow up, become responsible, and live on your own without throwing a kid in the mix.

And just because I had sex and got pregnant doesn't mean I sleep around. People make mistakes. I made a mistake with one person. But since I got pregnant, I have to walk around with a red A on my chest because now everyone knows? Why is it that having sex is alright but when you get pregnant, its automatically so bad? Its like people think you're stupid. Guess what? People get pregnant while using protection all the time! So its not ignorance, its just part of your plan. That's it.

Want to know what single mom's really are? They're strong and motivated. They're a mom and a dad. They're hardworking. They're so incredibly loving and make so many sacrifices. They don't give up. They stare down the oppisition in this world that says they can't do it and they show them, yes, I can- despite all the disadvantages, the hardships, the lack of experience, money, whatever.

At the end of the day, we're people, like you.. with challenges and trials, like you.. and these trials were a part of our plan.. and all trials are blessings.. yours just may not come without wedding bands by stork wrapped in pink and blue.

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